It has been seven years since I wrote about the subject of freedom. The last time was July 3rd, 2016. A lot has happened since July of 2016, so I thought I would see if my perceptions have changed since way back then. Back then Obama was still president and we were in the throws of inflammatory campaign hyperbole between Hillary and Donald. Fortunately or unfortunately, I don't pay much attention to political rhetoric as experience has taught me that what is said has little bearing on what actually happens once the fight is over. My concern is more about in what way all that noise will ultimately affect my life and the lives of the folks I know. I am concerned about freedom and about my liberty to pursue happiness in my life.

I am part of the boomer generation. My generation probably has had a greater opportunity to pursue what we believed to be happiness more than any human generation before or since. In the process, we have consumed staggering amounts of the world's resources creating lifestyles that are unsustainable on a global scale. How could pursuing happiness produce negative results? I believe the issue lies in what we think happiness is. Obviously, happiness looks different to each person, but is there a deeper common meaning that applies to everyone? I suggest that there is a common deeper element to happiness. The common aspect can seem elusive is because it concerns the resolution of our most basic conflict in life — How can we be our true selves while still being connected to others who are all so different from us? Solving this deep dilemma is the root of happiness.


Our true self is not what we do or what we think or even what we believe and hold dear. Our true self is built into the very structure of our brain and body. Our core blueprint comes from our genetics and epigenetics, another chunk comes from how our brain and body develop while we are in our mother’s womb, and the last big chunk develops in the first 5 to 7 years as our brain lays down the basic wiring for understanding the world around us. The blueprint for our basic character traits is pretty much laid down by the time we reach the age of seven. Most of the stuff we think of as our true self is really just the ego self-identity stories we have learned and developed to empower us to participate with others in life. These masks, personas, and stories are not the true us. While pursuing the goals of these personas is exciting, it does not bring us actual happiness.


The freedom humans crave is the ability to pursue the manifestation of their inborn potential. This is what gives meaning to our lives. This meaning exists in every moment of our lives and is manifested in the exercising of our freedom of choice. I reveal myself here as having been influenced by Viktor Frankl's 1946 book Man's Search For Meaning as well as the psychologists Maslow, Erikson, and Rodgers. They were all the rage back when I was in college. Since those days, I have seen their perspectives affirmed over and over in my life.


The drive for self-manifestation lives within us on a very deep feeling level; what I consider the heart level. It is the hidden motivator hiding behind so much of what we do. This drive lives in contrast to the more obvious drives running our lives governed by our ego. The ego is a good thing when used properly. Our ego is the tool we created to interface with and guide us in surviving the outside world. It is not really our truth, but more the container we hold our current survival skills in. The problem is that it has a direct wire hookup to our fear center in the brain. The ego is constantly watching the world around us for any threats (real or imagined) to our capacity to get our survival needs met now or in the future. Consequently, the ego is very noisy, meaning that it can grab our attention any time it wants by triggering our fight or flight fear feelings. Likewise, it can also trigger excitement, even euphoria through the reward center in our brain. We easily confuse this with joy.


I should pause here for a moment to clarify the difference between excitement and joy (happiness). Excitement is based on the drive to win, to come out on top, and to be number one. Excitement is the pursuit of the ego’s desire to be the center of all things and get its way with the least participation or risk. Survival is the job of the ego and excitement is the feeling-feedback that says we are maximizing our potential to survive in a competitive environment. The ego thrives on a win-lose mindset. The joyful heart, on the other hand, thrives in a cooperative, connected, win-win environment where survival is enhanced by everyone’s supportive participation in common goals. Excitement is an ego thing while joy is a heart thing. That is why the pursuit of ego goals like safety or money or power does not bring happiness — it can’t. The ego lives on the emotional roller coaster of struggling with the outside world while the heart lives to manifest our inner potential and bring that to the world. When we think of the creation of the Constitution that the Fourth of July celebrates, it puts the intention of the framers of the Constitution into a very different light. They were saying that we need to be free to pursue heart-centered goals — goals that bring people together and support working together for the common good. You see this same consciousness echoed throughout the US Constitution.


The last seven years have seen our country become more and more divisive. In my lifetime, there have always been differing viewpoints and strong feelings of attachment to individual beliefs, but the overall perspective was to try to seek a compromise that gave everyone some of what they wanted. No one ever got things all their way. Government existed as a means to hammer out those compromises. No one was ever happy with how things would end up, but they were okay with it. Now extremism seems to be the norm. Being middle of the road is almost considered a crime by either side in any dispute. My way or the highway is the game now. This tells me that the egos have taken over the game of life. People are not listening to their hearts these days. The ego makes a great and useful servant, but it makes a terrible master. We must keep our hearts open and in charge of our life.


Consider this while you are celebrating the formation of our amazing country. We still have so much potential waiting to manifest.  We need to get the ego control under control and put the heart in charge of our lives and the fate of our country. Given free reign the ego will choose “all for me and none for you," while the heart sees us all as one. Changing to a heart-based society is about each of us changing to a heart-based life every day, moment by moment. The heart calls for everyone to work equally together. Every act we perform needs to be mutually beneficial for those with whom we participate. Competition with others is out. The only useful competition is self-competition. 'More is better' is an outdated mindset. As we work to manifest ourselves in our lives, the word we are looking for is enough. We are enough just as we are. Now what do we need to do in order to share ourselves with others?  There is never enough to quiet the desperation of the ego. That is why we are in the trouble we are in right now. We are trying to quell the cries of the ego's desire to be all-important; the center of everything. Well, none of us is all that important, because value comes from what we give of ourselves to others.


If we want, we could make the 4^th of July all about what the fathers of our country originally intended for this country — life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. They did not say we are to chase self-importance and ego gratification in all things. They said nothing about we should get everything our own way. No, they came together as thirteen very different and very independent colonies with different needs and different wants, and they formed a union that they could all support. I believe that is precisely what we need now.


Take care,


David     

 

Ellen 

Saturday Ellen and I attended my aunt Sylvia's celebration of life. She passed away a couple months ago at the lovely age of 96. She was an interesting person who was very involved in many social causes. Her husband, my uncle Wes, was the minister at the Florin Methodist church for many years. Throughout my childhood I recall they were always off marching in one protest or another - Farmworker's rights, anti war, support of many causes. She was also a world traveler, often times traveling with my mother. It was a lovely gathering with family from all over the country showing up.